The Scandal premiere was the perfect combination of hot and heavy Olitz passion, and ripped-from-the-headlines political drama. The season opens with Fitz and Olivia living out their Vermont dreams in the White House bedroom. Mellie struggles with the blood on her hands (and still damp ink from her divorce papers) in accepting her new Senatorial seat.
But the real story is the American everygirl who managed to snag herself a real-life prince. The White House honors the Royals (while trying to butter up the Queen for some possible Naval bases) while Olivia and Abby gossip about the Princess in the bathroom. Her Royal Hotness overhears the ladies, which is exactly like this one time my friend and I were in the bathroom gossiping about a girl and it turned out she was in the stall next to us.
That girl just unfriended us on Facebook, but the Princess’s story turned out even more tragic. It turns out the Queen was real mad that her daughter in law was in love with her body guard and the baby inside her would inherit the crown – but someone else’s genetics. So, she did what any evil queen would do – she hired someone to have them all killed and make it look like an accident.
I guess she watches House of Cards.
The Queen is brought to justice, but it’s a far cry from Olivia Pope’s happily ever after. After all, what kind of fairy tale begins with the Princess getting busted doing the walk of shame outside the castle?
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